From the Heart and Soul

Inside-out

2009-02-18T00:38:00.002-06:00

So here I was, having kind of a drought in my scriptural reading life, and I get out of my Ancient History class surprisingly early and decide that it would be good to spend the time on my quiet time for the day. I have been going through "My Utmost for His Highest" and I absolutely love it. Today's entry was about 1 Kings and when the angel of the Lord came to Elijah, woke him up and told him to get up and... eat. The entry was about depression. I stopped and thought, "am I depressed? God how does this even apply to me?"

I took a moment and looked back on what had happened in my life over the last week. I wasn't suffering from depression as we view it today, but I was suffering from spiritual depression. I was down and not as up and living life to the fullest like I usually was. God used this simple passage, to do the simple things that you are presented with and you will find joy and peace in God, to bring me not only out of the rut I was in, but also to, in my opinion, kinda show me who is the boss, who is God.

And it's crazy how if you just do the simple things God asks of you the openings he gives you! Turns out that my Ancient History teacher actually used to teach my Old Testament Studies class and is a very solid Christian man, and through the poem that I wrote for my comp class, I found out that one of the guys in the class was a Christian struggling with being public with his faith when he was waiting for me outside of the classroom to talk to me and to tell me how brave I was sharing such an intimate part of my life through my poem.

Today is a new day, DO WORK!

Character

2009-01-31T16:50:00.003-06:00

John Randles, by far my most favorite speaker, spoke at Angus last Sunday to wrap up the marriage retreat our church had. He pressed the point of having a good, Godly character. Over the weekend he said many times that smart people don't listen to what you say, they watch what you do. They don't care about your Christian shirt or your Jesus fish on the bumper of your car, but more about what you do in that shirt and how you drive that car. He said something interesting that hit me. "People look to your character to see who you are. If they like what they see, THEN they will look at and read your advertisements and listen to what you say."

Did you know that for every person that becomes a Christian three more people become Muslims? If you look at their character you can see what they believe in, that they are genuine. If you were more genuine to the people around you that don't know Christ, don't you think they would start to take more interest to what is on your shirt or what bumper sticker is on your car to see why you are different than them? It's my goal to start living what I advertise.

Do work!

Identity

2009-01-20T11:37:00.003-06:00

While in my Intro to Religious Studies class I was confronted with an astonishing fact. Somewhere around 85% of the US population identify themselves as being of the Christian faith. Of that 85%, only 10-15% are able to identify one of the Four Gospels.

When we look at other countries, mostly in the Middle East, where the religion of the normal citizen is also that of the state religion, it is easy to see why they seem to take their religion much more seriously and integrate it into every aspect of their lives. We as Americans obviously don't have a state-issued or state-backed religion such as those countries, so there is nothing really making us follow up with the claims we make about what religion we profess to belong to.

Except...

There are many passages that talk about growing in our spiritual maturity (2 Timothy 2:15, 1 Peter 2:2), taking up roles as soldiers for Christ and winning people for His kingdom (2 Timothy 2:24-25, Matthew 28:19), and living your life for God (Romans 12:1-2, Titus 2:11-12, Matthew 5:13-16). So much is asked of the people who call themselves brothers and sisters of Christ, yet most of us settle with the Sunday-Wednesday routine followed up by maybe telling someone that you are a Christian if there is no way to work yourself out of saying it. Why is it that it almost seems socially unacceptable to be a true and honest follower of Christ? This is why I think that people who live in the Middle Eastern part of the world are much more at a benefit than we are. Not only is the country they are living in based off of their beliefs (although they are not the correct beliefs) but they are not guaranteed tomorrow. They live in a world where a stray missile or a suicide bomber could take their life away from them at any moment. Would you be more addament about being 100% full-out for God if you knew that you weren't guaranteed to get off the bus at your stop? Would you take advantage of every opportunity and try to win every person God put in your way because you didn't know if you would wake up the next day?

We are not guaranteed tomorrow. Christ may come back at any point in time and it will be unannounced, like a thief in the night (1 Thessalonians 5:4). We must live every day to the fullest, and that begins with accepting the life that comes with the identity. When Superman shifts into his alter ego Clark Kent, it would do him no good if he still went around acting like Superman. Neither does it help us out going around acting and behaving like non-believers when we profess and claim to be born-again Believers.

"...When the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from Heaven with His mighty angels in flaming fire; dealing our retributions to those who do not know God and to those who do not obey the Gospel of our Lord Jesus. Salvation is obeying the Gospel, refusing to obey the Gospel results in judgment. Obey the Gospel and these will pay the penalty of eternal destruction, away from the presence of the Lord And from the glory of His power. When He comes to be Glorified in His saints on that day and to be marveled at Among all those who have believed - for our testimony to You was believe. So He is going to come - He is going to judge the ungodly. And the Bible says, those of us who are saved; are going to marvel; this is going to be an amazing thing."
-lyrics from Flame's song "2nd Coming"

(reference in the song is to 2 Thessalonians 1:7-1o)

Take a moment...

2009-01-17T22:33:00.002-06:00

I want you to take a moment and think about your day and all the music that you come in contact with throughout said day. Think about how many of those songs have to do with someone singing about relationships, either how they like someone, are in a relationship, getting out of one, you see what I'm saying. There so many songs that constantly talk about the opposite sex, and those are just songs! So many people's lives revolve around meeting that right person, and what do you expect? Every media is constantly marketing items that will make you more attractive and appealing to the other gender.

Now, I just want you to go with me on this one. What if... all of the obsessions that people have, how hard they try, and how much of their lives they have devoted... what if all of that was focused on God? What if people tried that hard to get to know God? God created man and then wanted to get to know him and spend time with him, that God actually walked around with man in the beginning. Can you imagine spending half the time you spend worrying about the opposite sex and pursuing them and taking that time and putting it towards your walk with God?

I have been very consumed as of late in pursuing women. Why not focus on God and let Him bring the woman He made for me into my life when He feels I'm ready?

Just pondering life.

Life 4Him

2008-12-18T05:46:00.002-06:00

This being the end of the semester and with lots of hard finals to study and take, I haven't had time to get online and post all of my Enjoy The Silence notes on Facebook and I haven't been able to put up my reflections here. But here I am, awake at 6a.m., and all I can think about is what God is going to do with me.

That's a good thing though, right? We should be constantly thinking about God, His plan for us, and what we can do to fulfill that plan... right? Sometimes I wonder who is doing the thinking in my mind, if it's me, arguing with everything that is running around in my head, or if it is God, telling me that this is what He wants, this is what I need to do, and this is where my life is going to end up, and it's going to be the greatest thing to ever happen.

Surprisingly this semester I have run into the problem with people who are Christians not willing to be "super Christian". I'm sorry, but what in the heck does that mean!? What do you mean you don't want to be "super religious"!? Would you just rather be classified as a Christian but not be obligated to act like it!? WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO WHEN SUPPOSED "FOLLOWERS OF CHRIST" THINK IT IS TOO MUCH TO DEVOTE THEIR LIVES, THE ONES THAT THEY ALREADY GAVE TO HIM, TO FULLY FOLLOWING HIS COMMANDS!?!?

It hurts me when I talk to people and they tell me "well, I'm not super religious" or "I'm not really that radical". I am part of a Christian fraternity, and there are people in it who don't think it is acceptable or cool to be completely 100% for God. I just want to weep, knowing that there are men that I know who flat out refuse to be as passionate about God as some of the other men in the fraternity.

And why is it so hard to talk about your faith? Why is it that people cannot look into the life of a friend, possibly their best friend, and see the pain and suffering that they are enduring in their day-to-day life because they don't know the awesome love and grace and freedom and mercy of the God you call your Father and Savior? Why can't you just suck up your pride for 10 minutes to let them know about the one who should be oozing out of you 24/7? I promise that they won't bite you. I promise they won't punch you in the face. They aren't going to shoot you or call the police and have you sent to jail. The worst thing, THE ABSOLUTE WORSE THING that could happen from sharing your faith to someone is them not wanting to listen. If you tell a friend, they may even decide they don't want to be your friend anymore. OH NO! What are we to do? I know, let's not obey the Most High. Let's just ignore what the King of Kings and Lord of Lords has commanded us to do. That is definitely better than losing that friend that you really care about. The one that you party with. The one that "lets you be you". The friend that is probably keeping you from God.

I want to break down and cry for the laziness and complete disregard in doing what God has commanded us to do. I feel God calling me to do something, and I have put it off long enough. Soon enough you will all know what I have decided to do. It is life-altering, life-changing, and yes, I am for sure going to lose some friends, friends that I love, because of this choice. But I know that God is calling me to this, and I can no longer stay on the ship that is heading in the opposite direction.

"See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."
- Isaiah 43:19

Enjoy The Silence - Day 8

2008-12-09T18:20:00.002-06:00

I have always been one to profess how the world opinion doesn't matter, yet the underworkings and subtle doings in my life have always been to make myself liked by everyone, to be looked upon with adoration and, at times, exaltation. This has kept me from going full-out for God, for fear of making someone not like me anymore.
God is asking me to expose this dry place in my life, to stretch out this disability, this shame, so that He may heal this blemish and make me a new working part in His divine plan. All I have to do is allow God to work on the lifeless areas of my life and He will do great things.
Help me to let You do what You yearn to do in my life, Lord.

Enjoy The Silence - Day 7

2008-12-09T18:16:00.002-06:00

God is calling someone less than holy and less than righteous to go and save those in His name, yet all I can do is look at myself, look at all my flaws and don't give any thought to what the Almighty God can do with me, just as I am.
God has taken all the wrongs in my life and used them as ways to relate and give counsel to those who feel unclean and not worth to come to Him.
God, take what I have done in my life and use it to Your glory. May the harvest that I produce be multiplied a thousand fold from the works I do in Your name. May I lead people to You, showing Your love, mercy, and grace. May I show Your true self to everyone.

Enjoy The Silence - Day 6

2008-12-09T18:11:00.002-06:00

My ears listen to the audible sounds of love pouring from the heart of God. The pain that is in His heart for the lost and struggling is overwhelmed by the love that flows out to rescue, save, comfort, and dry the eyes of the weak and scared, the trembling and frightened people who need His love in their lives.
I open my eyes to see His love falling down on my life in the form of the people around me and the security God has installed. His love envelopes me, protecting me from harm and ensuring me that everything will be alright, that I have no need to cry. He is here.
God, let me be a vessel of such a love...

Enjoy The Silence - Day 5

2008-12-09T18:10:00.001-06:00

God is good, all the time.
All the time, God is good.
He never leaves, never forsakes.
He will always be, always do,
For those He loves.
God is Love.

Word of God Speak...

2008-12-04T21:54:00.003-06:00

As I am traveling closer to where I wish to be, right next to my Father in Heaven, I can't help but notice and, above all else, feel the changes that are happening in my life. I can feel God tearing away my views of the world, one at a time, and showing me how a Christian life is to be lived and what the important things are. I know it seems like I'm just talking, but please, key in on this: Humans as a whole are, by nature and by influence, self-centered people. Things such as "the American Dream" and "the brighter tomorrow" are all about you and what you deserve and how you can get there. God DID NOT make man to be about himself, but to rather turn back towards his Creator and praise Him for all that He has given to man.

Each day I see more and more that, with hindsight being 20/20, I am among the worst of what I speak of. Being almost 20 years old, I am self-centered to the point of not only using, but also hurting, the people around me, and I do it so that I can feel better and happier.

What is this!? What in my life made me this way? At what point can I look back in my life and say, "That! Right there! That is where this problem began!"? Where is the person responsible for this!? Who are they, because they need to be brought to justice for the lives that I have brought pain to because of what they did to me!?

The blame game is a sinkhole of pain and suffering, bringing nothing but chaos and ruin. "Accept responsibility for your actions" my dad always told me. And he was absolutely right. There is no one or no thing that blame can be put upon except myself.

Good thing there is a loving God up above that loves me for who I am. Good thing there is a loving God above who will not hold back his affection for me because of mistakes or blemishes in my life. Good thing there is a loving God above who can take all that pain and hurt away if I ask Him to. Good thing there is a loving God above who can lift me up out of the way I'm living and plant my feet on the path of righteousness. Good thing there is a loving God above that is longing to talk to me, to listen to me, to dry my eyes when I cry, to hold my hand when I am scared, and to even fight my battles when I am too weak. Good thing there is that All-Powerful and All-Loving God above who is my personal friend, and, with His strength and guidance, He will help me out of this life that I have been leading and will put me on the straight and narrow.

It's never too late when you have such a God on your side.

Enjoy The Silence - Day 4

2008-12-04T21:33:00.003-06:00

Hebrews 4:12-16

Jesus, You are not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with my weaknesses. You know how I struggle with pornography, sexual immorality, lust, greed, deceit, and contentment. You were tempted with all of these things, yet You, in Your holiness, were without sin.

It is human nature to be frightened by the thought of exposure, scared that someone may come along and let out to the world our true selves. Why don't we feel that way about God? He sees everything we do, hears every thought in our mind, knows the inner workings of our heart; no secret is held nor action hidden from His eyes. Yet that does not seem to change the fact that we continue to do things that we know are not pleasing to Him, we continue to do them, just as long as no person on earth finds out.

We should be ashamed. We should be horrified that the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the One to whom the heavenly hosts sing praises for eternity, that the Lord God Almighty sees what we do when we are alone, that He hears the awful things we think, and that He knows the evil that dwells in the recesses of our hearts. We should be distraught and full of sorrow.

But Oh! How great is our God! Endless in His love and mercy! All He wants is for us to come to Him, with all of our baggage and burdens, and to lay them down before His throne, at the feet of the Father. He loves us unconditionally, just as we are. Can we not give up our secrets and let God enter and rain down His glory on all areas, public AND private, of our lives?

Enjoy The Silence - Day 3

2008-12-04T20:32:00.003-06:00

Isaiah 6:1-8

My life is so full of "me" phrases that it would be near impossible to cover them all. My entire life has been about me, what other people can do for me and what I can do for myself.

All my life I have been a person focused on self gratification. To me, right now, switching to a 100% God, for-Him, focused life would go against nearly 20 years of habit. Even though that is the truth, it is what I want to happen for my life more than anything I could hope or dream for. My goals and dreams would be for naught if God was not in the midst of them. I have come to the revelation that I am content in what God has planned for me, and I cannot wait for Him to reveal His plan.

Enjoy The Silence - Day 2

2008-12-04T20:28:00.002-06:00

Jeremiah 31:16-25

The highway of my life is the road of self-serving indulgence. It is taking me along the path of lies and deception to achieve its desired destination. There are many signs along the way, put up by myself, my father, and a few from God. They are mostly warnings of the ruin that I am headed towards.

I have traveled far from where I desire to be, and it is all but too late to save myself. The only thing I can do now is ask forgiveness and hope that God takes pity and mercy on me once again...

Enjoy The Silence - Day 1

2008-12-04T20:10:00.001-06:00

Luke 8:4-15

As I look at my life, compared to the soils mentioned in the reading, I feel as though my heart is the choked soil, so consumed by everything around me that I do not give God the place in my life that He deserves. The distractions of the world captivate my attention when I should have my eyes affixed on the One that can make everything go away and install peace in my life. God has given me so much, why is it so hard to give Him an hour of my day for a quiet time? A few seconds before a meal for a prayer? An afternoon on Sunday's to spend in His presence?

God has the power to pull the weeds from my heart, the weeds that are choking and tearing down my relationship with Him. Let go, my heart, and allow yourself to be worked on by Him. Let Him sow seeds of life and love, hope and wisdom, so that you may grow up, mature in righteousness, and give back to the Kingdom of God the good fruit you will produce.